Today I feel discouraged. I am in college and this semester seems to just be dragging me down. Really, I don’t feel like I have gotten much out of it.
I’m sad because I don’t feel like I spend much time thinking about projects, but I think I am a person that needs to be in the right atmosphere for creativity. The sphere I am in this semester I don’t think allows for that.
I think the times that I am most productive are during the day, meaning 9-5. What seems to be hard for me is that all my classes are in between those times and then when 5 o’clock rolls around, I am less motivated to do work.
The problem with classes is that there is so much wasted time. Classes are so constricting. You have all this work time but what am I supposed to get done in the four walls of that cement building.
What I really wish was that we could be briefed on what the instructor wants to tell us, and then when it is break time to work, I want to be able to do what ever I need to do to be as productive as I can. This for me usually means working on the next thing I have to get done, over doing what I am supposed to do for that class. I just wish I was free to do that without the fear of being scolded to do work for that class, or have an absence.
We all work in different ways, and the way the school would have me work is just not how I work best.
This leads me to being very sad about school all the time. It makes me feel like I am an awful person that can’t prioritize or get anything done.
But I don’t think that is true. I can be very productive, and I am a good worker. This atmosphere is just not the one for me. I can’t wait to be in the work place, where my work is during the day and in one place.
I am hoping next semester I will find some inspiration leading out of my last semester of school. The schedule I have set up is like no other that I have had before. There is time that is allotted through out my everyday to work on school stuff because I have me classes scheduled in the morning and the evening. Thus leaving all the time in between to get work done.
Wish me luck.